Down to the Bone

It cuts close to the bone. It stings when flesh reacts to 350 degrees. And then it burns. And my stomach turns into a knot. And I am saddled with an anxiety that I have never quite been approached with before.

That I Would Be Good If I Did Nothing?

It sits on my shoulder. And it whispers in my ear, right before I fall asleep at night.

That self doubt. That I will never figure anything out. Why bother? Because I can only run into so many brick walls.

I Wish I Had River I Could Skate Away On

Maybe I am writer? Spending so many years denying it after failing, thinking of coming back to it. I need to come back to something.

I know most don't have anything figured out, but they get by. I am not getting by. I am drowning. What if I just don't know?

Saying that out loud. It's hard enough to say it out loud, but when you say it to someone else the doubt, the pity, and the amount of time they take in trying to figure out a solution. They search for it. Or they search for me. It's as if I just misplaced my keys.

But maybe I did? Because my door isn't opening anymore.

It's A Bitch To Grow Up

And my bed feels warmer than it ever has, even when I'm laying by myself. That moment when you wake up, before you start the day. There's so much promise in that moment. Before you realize what your days is and your responsibility is.

And then you have to respond to what the world gives you.

I need the world to give me more.

Yes, I watch a lot of TV

So a new season of TV has started and with that comes a lot to watch from past years and some new shows to get involved in. What do I watch you ask? Well here's a list -

Sunday Nights:
Once Upon a Time
Masters of Sex (new)

Monday Nights:
Sleepy Hollow (new)
Castle

Tuesday Nights:
New Girl
Sons of Anarchy

Wednesday Nights:
American Horror Story: Coven
The Middle
Revolution
Modern Family
Criminal Minds
Nashville
Super Fun Night (new)

Thursday Nights:
Big Bang Theory
Grey's Anatomy
Parenthood
Project Runway
Once Upon a Time in Wonderland (new)

Saturday Nights:
SNL

Shows that I watch but that haven't started yet:
Game of Thrones
The Walking Dead
Orange is the New Black
The Americans
Bates Motel
Hannibal
Downton Abbey
True Blood
Rizzoli and Isles

Shows that have ended that I have watched:
Lost
Fringe
Dexter
Friends
Friday Night Lights
American Horror Story
American Horror Story: Asylum
The Tudors
Ally McBeal
Six Feet Under
Full House
Sex and the City
Alias
24
Ugly Betty
ER
Touch
In Plain Sight
Mercy
Go On
Off the Map
Saved by the Bell
Dollhouse
Battlestar Galactica
Firefly
Jem
Fraggle Rock
Pushing Daisies

Shows that I am currently marathoning:
Breaking Bad
The L Word
Homeland

Shows in my netflix queue to watch soon:
Arrested Development

So if you ask me what I watch. Well the answer is EVERYTHING!